Don't Call Me Jo-Jo

I have a good friend. Her name is Cathy. We work together. We play together. In fact, we’re thinking about writing a book together. We’re like two peas in a pod except that we’re almost total opposites about everything. I’m Jewish. She’s Irish. We both have guilt and we both like brussel sprouts. She likes hers with dijon mustard. I prefer butter. And we both love chick flicks.

Cathy has four daughters. I have one son. Major differences. I used to step on Lego pieces in my bare feet. She crunched down on Barbie shoes. She’s big into glitter and Disney stuff. I detest Disney. OK, ok. So call me harsh. I’m just not into all the Princess stuff.

We’re both voracious readers. Cathy is into all this self-help stuff. And authors that make her take out stock in tissue companies. I just finished The Thin Man by Dashiell Hammett. You can see where this is going.

Cathy and I both love to shop. And eat. I’m bad with portion control. Her main food group is french fries. I’m a salad lover. Cathy tells me salad does not a dinner make. OK. No problem. I’ll throw on a bottle of bleu cheese dressing and call it protein.

We shop in different stores. I introduced her to Nordstrom’s and Sephora, which is our FAVORITE indulgence. Last night she introduced me to the joys of shopping 3 days before Christmas at Walmart. I don’t do Walmart. I was there once. I had a panic attack. It was like being in a horror film. I hate horror films.

Cathy was in a bind. She needed a store that was open late, convenient to our trip home from work and priced right. Remember-she has four daughters. I was a little nervous. I was thinking I might need a dose of antibiotics after leaving the store.

She bought everything and then some. I even bought a mascara. Priced $3 cheaper than I usually find it. Success. And the best part was that my car was still intact in the parking lot.

I still won’t go into a Walmart unless Cathy is there to hold my hand. I guess it’s true what they say: opposites do attract. Anybody up for Sephora after the holidays?